BEHIND THE PRETTY FACE

Life in the 21^st century is full of frustrations, deadlines, hassles and stress that drains us psychologically, emotionally, physically and other wise. Yet these are nothing compared to the joys and pains of motherhood. Like a double edged sword, motherhood fulfills many parts of a woman’s soul. On the other hand, motherhood is also energy sapping, and behind the pretty smiling faces of the 21^st century working mother is the heavy burden of juggling a job, self-care, parenting, and babysitting a husband. This leaves women vulnerable to stress and other health hazards such as: high blood pressure, suppressing of immune system, heart attack, stroke, rewiring of the brain (anxiety and depression), skin conditions such as eczema, obesity, pain of any kind, sleep problems etc. As a result of this, there is need for working mothers to strike a balance between their career, family and social life.

As a working mother, your ability to cope or tolerate stress depends on so many factors like your quality of relationship, genetic make-up and emotional intelligence. However, some stress can be self generated through inability to accept uncertainty, negative-self talk, pessimism, unrealistic expectations and perfectionism. As a career mum, here are some symptoms you need to look out for:

• Mood swings
• Memory problems
• Feeling overwhelmed
• Sense of loneliness
• Isolation
• Lack of concentration
• Poor judgment
• Anxious or racing thoughts
• Nervous habits (nail biting and pacing)
• Frequent colds
• Eating more or less
• Irritability or quick temper
• Loss of sex drive
• Rapid heart beat
• Inability to relax and
• Seeing only the negative.

All of the above and many more are indications that you need to identify the source of the stress and do the following in other to stay healthy and happy:

• Take charge: take control of your emotions, environment, avoid hot-button topics, and pair down your to-do list.
• Be assertive: learn to always express your feelings in a subtle way instead of bottling them up. Be willing to compromise (not core values please), and manage your time better by avoiding busy diaries.
• Change the situation: if you can’t change the stressor, then change yourself by adjusting your expectations and having attitudinal re-engineering.
• Have good sex: the human body benefits from sex in so many ways, says Joy Davidson, PhD, a New York psychologist and sex therapist. A recent research carried out by Davidson and other experts reveals that sex does the following for women.

• Relieves stress
• Burns calories
• Improves cardiovascular health
• Boosts immune system
• Boosts self esteem
• Improves intimacy
• Reduces pain
• Strengthen pelvic floor muscles
• Enhances good sleep.

While the working moms battle all of these health hazards, they need all the support they can get from their husbands, children and family members. Take out time to buy them gifts, tell them soothing words and shower them with praises. May God bless all the working mums of the 21^st century.