Fortunately, we are not in this alone. Today's Dad is more involved than ever before and he is definitely shouldering his part of the responsibilities. With so many women going back to work outside the home and starting home-based businesses, Dads have really had more of an opportunity to step it up and share the family roles while mom helps to ease the financial burden. And it is no different with stay-at-home moms because being with children all day while taking care of a house and trying to have some personal time can overwhelm even the toughest woman, so help is still needed and perhaps even more so, by Dads in this situation.
Despite how well dads are doing these days at contributing to the awesome responsibility of parenting, sometimes they still feel lost in their role at home. At work they thrive. They know what to do, how to do it and they receive financial compensation for their labour. At home however, they may have to be reminded of when the kids eat, what time they come back from school, and what new discipline strategies Mom has implemented. It can feel awkward, challenging and frustrating at times. Although we live in a society that doesn't really understand this dilemma, there is something out there for every dad who feels he needs an edge on parenting.
Awkward Adjustment;
The newborn stage is an especially awkward time for dads because mom has spent nearly ten months with her child living inside of her and she is pretty much the sole provider of comfort and feeding when the bundle of joy is born. This leaves dad to wonder how he can bond with the baby and what he can do to contribute. One way dads have been successful at bonding with their newborns is through sharing feedings. And there are products out there, like the bottle that is shaped like a mother's breast, that allow dads to share in the joy of feeding their baby while allowing mom to rest easy knowing that her child will not experience nipple confusion or become gassy from a bottle.
Another way dads can bond with their newborns is through comfort. This is sometimes intimidating for them because it seems moms are pre-programmed with the ability to soothe, while it is often a learned art for dad. There are several products that can help comfort baby and ease them into sweet slumber, such as really nice diapers and stuffed animals that attach to the crib and make soothing noises.
Brave Daddy;
As your baby starts to get a little older, dad may feel brave enough to go on an outing alone with him or her, perhaps in an effort to give you a break. This is a confidence builder for him and a sanity saver for you. And it may only take one failed attempt to discourage him from trying it again, so make sure he is 100% loaded with all the right products to ensure success on his outing and future breaks for you. One thing he is sure to need is a diaper bag outfitted with all the diapers, wipes, and bottles he could possibly need, but do you really think he wants to be seen carrying that hip satin Chinese print shoulder bag/backpack you use? If so, think again. Dads are simple and practical, which is why in some foreign countries, companies have started making daddy diaper bags that come in a variety of dad-approved colors and keep their hands free to chase after babies on the go. Though these products are still making their way through the the Nigerian market, one thing is sure, dads are pretty good at improvising!
Shared Experiences;
You and your husband have no doubt shared the duty of changing diapers, putting the kids to bed and feeding them so why not continue to do this when you enter into the realm of potty and toilet training? This way you are a team and your child knows you both mean business. It also ensures that if you need to run an errand or be away from the child while your husband watches him or her, he will know what to do, when to do it, and how to do it with regard training your young to use the toilet. If you want your husband to partner with you on this sometimes challenging journey, be prepared with the right equipment and make it fun and enjoyable and say bye bye to diapers!
Dads Just Want to Have Fun;
Dad does a lot to help out around the house and with the kids, but there is more to parenting than just being responsible and doing what you think is best for your children. It has to be fun! Playing is an element that cannot be overlooked because it is all too important to the learning and development of little ones, not to mention an excellent way for dad to bond with his children as they grow older.
Dads deserve to be celebrated for how they provide for their families, come home to relieve mom, and create lifelong memories with their children as often as possible. They are not perfect but they are invaluable. As moms, we have the ability to equip the fathers of our children with all the right tools to help them feel more comfortable in their role as daddy, from newborn to university graduates. All it takes is a little creativity, forethought and caring. So, whatever stage of parenting you are in, consider what it will take to get your husband more involved on all levels and then be proactive in helping him get there. You know, the average Nigerian dad is full of surprises!
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